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Title: One Wild Night (The Results Of~)
Rating and Warnings: PG-14
Disclaimer: SRatSS belong to WEP and I only often borrow them to write pieces of fiction. I make absolutely no profit of that.
Summary: just what the title says. No associations with Bon Jovi song, please.

**
Saber stumbled over something, was by rough hands rudely put up and pushed into the dark cell, in which he stretched full-length face to the ground. The iron doors closed in the loud slam behind, leaving him in the complete darkness. There was a small barred and dirty window high above but the moon was not up yet.

A voice in the dark: if by this you tried to illustrate the expel from Paradise, I give you eleven points out of ten.

Saber managed to kneel up and sit on his heels. He narrowed his eyes trying to see who was there in the darkness with him. When his eyes got used to the dark the first thing he, - in fact, his nose, - could tell was the cigarette smoke rising to the air.

The same voice: you look finely pissed.

Saber rubbed his forehead, still not getting up: yesterday we had a birthday party of one of my friends. So I feel kinda hangover.

There was a chuckle of satisfaction in the dark.

The same snide voice: my my, can that be the cowpoke by any chance?

Saber immediately felt he didnít like this. He didnít like this at all. His eyes panicking raided the cell.

Saber: Jesse?

Something (someone?) flopped down from above. Saber faintly imagined the standard cell layout and thought that must have been one of the three bunks. He humbly managed to stand up feeling his way and wiped his knees. When he stood up upright he suddenly felt the cigarette smoke stink close to his face and retreated a few steps back.

Saber: yak!
Jesse: what, not your usual brand?
Saber: not my brand at all. Iím a non-smoker.
Jesse chuckled: not * yet* a one.
Saber: how the heck you can see so well in the dark?
Jesse: there is no one more blinder then he who does not want to see.

The dark cell was raided by the yellow electricity blaze. Saberís eyes got immediately teary and he started winking terribly. When his eyes got used to the new means of light he stared at the person a few steps in front of him, still tears running down his cheeks.

Saber wiping the tears by his knuckles: uhÖ
Jesse: whatís the occasion?
Saber winking: my contact lenses are sensible to cigarette smoke.
Jesse grinned and started walking around Saber: so you are shortsighted. That doesnít surprise me much, I should say. Sometimes your decisions and actions were really shortsighted andÖare you listening to me?

Saber dully thought that Jesse must have spent here enough time alone if he was so unusually willing to communicate. And he himself, in fact, was willing not. He only wanted to lie back without the pillow, crook legs and eat an orange, like a normal hangovering man.

Jesse making his fifth circle: so what was the brawl you got into about?
Saber immediately took the position of defense: I did not get into a brawl.

Jesse didnít answer that. He just paused walking, raised one eyebrow and fixed his gaze on Saberís left cheekbone. It was of subtle dark violet colour. Saber felt the bruise covering in goose-skin from Jesseís look.

Saber whispered: I slipped in the bathroom.
Jesse grinned again: pushed by your wifey?
Saber flushing: none of your business.
Jesse getting on the bunk by the barred window: heh, you havenít yet learned how to lie properly. So who won the brawl?

Saber sighed. When Jesse Blueís claws get hold of one and the same idea Ö He observed a big spider, who was scared by the light and getting in one of the bunks, and turned to get on to the other, right under Jesseís. The two iron bowls of some porridge were pushed in on the small wooden bench and the doors closed again.

Saber: what does this mean?
Jesse: feeding time. So who won the brawl?
Saber: if I tell you will you leave me alone?
Jesse squealed in delight: so you lost it!
Saber: Iím glad you are amused. You ainít possibly gonna eat that?
Jesse: what? Eh, the grub. Nah, that one is not bad. But youíd better stay away from Friday cuisine.
Saber: I hope I wonít have to stay here for that long. But what are you doing here?
Jesse getting down: here you either eat quickly or you donít eat at all.

He strolled to the bench and took one bowl. Then he turned to Saber.

Jesse: you coming?
Saber: not really.
Jesse: uuuuuu, not a Tin Star standard, right? Donít mind if I take yours too?
Saber: be my guest.

Jesse spilled the content of Saberís bowl to that of his own, leveled it with the spoon and climbed back to his bunk, messing up there. Saber laid back, stared at the bottom of the bunk above him, a smile curved his lips, he silently chuckled and kicked the bunk above him. Powerfully kicked. A couple of seconds later from the suddenly became quiet bunk above Jesseís angry head hung down over the edge. Saber grinned expecting. For a moment Jesse looked as if he would throw himself on Saber but then he quietly returned back. Saber unpleasantly felt that his expectations somehow had gone unfulfilled.

In due time his ear was annoyed by the harsh scream of metal when Jesse was scrapping the bowl clean. Saberís body shivered, he clenched his teeth and pressed a sort of a pillow to his ears.

Saber: is this really necessary?
Jesse: I can run it through the window bars if you like.
Saber: no, please donít, thank you. Anyhow, what are you doing here?
Jesse: well, I went to one sly bar and the owner saw I got drunk enough so he wanted to soak me twice for the drinks. He was a big fat creature, by the way. But he got the wrong man to bother.
Saber: and?
Jesse: he broke his nose to my fist.
Saber: and?
Jesse: he fell on the bar and broke dozens of bottles.
Saber: and?
Jesse: he sued me for the damage.
Saber: and you donít have money to pay.
Jesse: even if I had, I wouldnít. Itís the matter of principle now. Downstream you can swim only to one direction, Tin Star. I suppose somebody will come to pay a bail for you?
Saber rubbed his forehead: hmmmÖnot really.
Jesse: what?
Saber: wellÖ
Jesse: wha-at?
Saber: Fireball and ColtÖ
Jesse suddenly interested: aha?
Saber: we are immediate cell neighbours now.
Jesse whistled: yahoo. So we are on our own now, right?
Saber: yeah.
Jesse: wonít you call Commander Eagle?
Saber sighed: heís on leave.
Jesse: and I suppose you didnít bring April with you?
Saber: hellís no. It was a men party, after all.
Jesse: so if you would call her and ask for help she would simply hang up the phone?
Saber: yep.
Jesse bit his forefingerís nail: you Tin Stars ainít much of help, you know.

Saber stuck out his tongue to the bunk above him.

Jesse: are you making grimaces now?
Saber panicking looking around: no! No!
Jesse chuckled: liar.
Saber: why donít you call somebody to bail you out?
Jesse: now, thatís an interesting one. Letís think whom I could possibly call?

The light winked and died. The cell drowned in the darkness again.

Saber: what now?
Jesse: bedtime. Know a good bedtime story?

Saber sighed. He must have done something really terrible in his past life. Or Jesse was under the influence of some preparation. Saber didnít even know which variant would be better.

Jesse changed his body position for the tenth time during the last five minutes: do you know what is the thing that annoys outriders most in the whole forsaken Vapour Zone? The one that drives them really nuts?

ďYou,Ē- thought angrily Saber and almost grabbed his mouth in order not to say that aloud.

Jesse was still disporting: Yuma to Tin Star, Yuma to Tin Star, is anybody at home?
Saber: Jesse?
Jesse: au?
Saber: could you do me a favour?
Jesse: depends what.
Saber: letís compete which one of us will manage to keep silent longer.
Jesse kept quiet for a few moments ruminating over the proposal and then giggled: very well, Tin Star, very well.
**
Saber woke up in the dimness of early morning light and got scared by the unusual surrounding but after a few moments he started remembering the events of the last night. He silently got hold of the edge of the bunk above him, chinned-up and verified the hard to believe information. Jesse was peacefully snuffling. Saber returned to his bunk and sat crossing legs in a Turkish manner. He was still feeling a little bit sick.

Some time passed before the movements on the upper most bunk indicated the occupant of it starting to wake up. Finally a long and loud yawn sliced the morning silence. A pair of legs swung down the upper most bunk and swinged right in front of Saberís eyes.

Saber: I take that as a ďgood morning.Ē
Jesse: why are you so early today? Afraid to be late for work?
Saber ignoring the giggle above him: at least I have one.
Jesse: or had. How many Cavalry Command regulations did you break?
Saber: three or four. Tomorrow I should be out.

The door screamed open and a sergeant came in, a pretty scared private soldier following him. As far as Saberís memory could tell, the squatty was one of a few who arrested him last night.

The sergeant: we are terribly sorry, Captain Rider, for this terrible misunderstanding. Our private soldiers didnít know you tried to keep order in that bar and you got involved in the fight only to help to repress the armed drunkard. You and your people may leave. Please accept our apologies.

Saber jumped down from the bunk and headed to the door: well, next time be careful about whom you are arresting. Be glad we are not holding anything against you. Hey, you, on the bunk, donít make me wait the whole morning.

Saber turned on the threshold and answered Jesseís questioning stare. Jesse slowly got down from the bunk, slid hands to the pockets and strode to the doors.

Jesse to the sergeant: yeah, right.
The private soldier: butÖ
Saber: my people and I are leaving. Is something wrong with that?
**
Saber was pacing the sandy forest path to the base. Fresh cool morning air winded his head and he was feeling much better. Suddenly he turned round and faced the man that was following him.

Saber: look, you donít really have to follow me all the way.
Jesse shrugged his shoulders: Iím not guilty that I have to walk the same way with you for some time.
Saber: I already said Iím not gonna turn you in. Iím not in a good shape for that at the moment. Why donít you just get lost? Iím sure youíll find some place to hide, some lair, perhaps.
Jesse: what? The idea that you might actually be spotted accompanied by ďYumaís Most WantedĒ doesnít appeal to you?

Saber bewildered looked around for a stone or a stick.

Jesse made a mourning face: itís so sad your other Tin Friends couldnít join us. One drunkard had to carry home another. Now thatís really touching. Really.

Saber turned around and started pacing, realizing the only way to get rid of Jesse was to reach some peopled area. But Jesse wouldnít give up his position. He started skipping follow Saber.

Jesse: hey, Tin Star, letís find a city bigger and organize a brawl better!

Saber was aching for putting his palms over his ears and starting running but the remains of a Star Sheriff dignity prevented him from that. Jesse was now up to knees wading in turn the trenches on the both sides of the path, splashing the water from the last weekendís rainstorm. He jumped high, landed in the middle of the puddle and splashed the water on Saberís uniform. Saber shivered from cold drops getting under his collar, pursed his lips and turned to Jesse with a strong word of reproach just to meet another splash of water. A moment later the two men were soaked to the skin splashing in the dirty trench water, trying to spill as much water on the opponent as possible.

Saber tossing the wet hair strands back from his face: had enough?
Jesse sat down panting on the big wayside rock by the crossroad: I havenít even started, Tin Star.

Jesse took out the wet pack of cigarettes and looked at it surprised.

Jesse: hell. Completely forgot about that.
Saber chuckled: thereís God in Heaven.
Jesse coldly: I hope youíll go prematurely bald, Tin Star.
Saber: if there is karma youíll be reborn as a toadstool.

Jesse shot Saber a look of insulted dignity and opened his mouth to argue but the whole situation was too amusing to start a quarrel about. So he shut up and started taking off his shoes in turns, spilling out a respectable amount of water. Saber glanced at the path that was leading to the base.

Saber: umÖso I should be goingÖ

Jesse nodded silently. Saber paused for a minute, lightly kicking a soil lump, hands in his pockets.

Saber scratched his forehead: uhumÖso, adieu.

Jesse again nodded silently, finishing putting on his shoes. Saber slowly turned back and went, water loudly splashing in his own shoes. A few times he quickly glanced over his shoulder just to spot the receding figure sitting on the wayside rock. When he glanced for the last time before stepping on the asphalt way to the base, Jesse had been gone.



The End

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